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Friday, August 20, 2004

Speaking of seclusion

The old lover who has exotic tastes in sex once again asked me if I wanted to fuck him tonight. I lied and said I was going out with friends to the bars ( I am broke). Why I felt the need to lie I don't know. I want intimacy but not with him? I want a fresh start with others? I am sitting here pondering what the hell is wrong with me. Maybe the seclusion IS getting to me. I love my privacy now; maybe I'm not ready to give it up.

1 comments:

Clint said...

Privacy can be very fulfilling, especially if it's not something you've had in a while. Sometimes, we need to take some time off from humanity and simply explore ourselves to see if there's something we missed. I've gone through phases like that ... and typically, I've enjoyed them. Maybe--aside from the obvious hormonal drive--intimacy isn't really what you need at this point. Maybe you just need some time alone.

I keep commenting here ... I hope this doesn't annoy.