Saturday, February 19, 2005

Who I am..A manifesto

The Invitation by Oriah Mountain Dreamer has a pretty controversial section in it...

"It doesn’t interest me if the story you are telling me
is true.
I want to know if you can
disappoint another
to be true to yourself.
If you can bear the accusation of betrayal
and not betray your own soul.
If you can be faithless
and therefore trustworthy."

No one protects me but me. I have learned after my husband died hard lessons. I will not lose myself to please another. There won't be a moment of sleep lost on my part for living the life I choose. For believing in the faith I hold. I will not be made to feel ashamed about who I am. I make no apologies nor want any. No longer will I settle for ANYTHING less than what I want and what I DEEM is good for me. If I upset others by believing this, FUCK THEM. I don't want to hurt people intentionally, or be cruel. I just want to have a man of my own, a career of my own, and a fulfilling faith OF MY OWN. Yes some consider me a slut, thief an liar. Am I? A slut probably yes that's one word for it. Do I lie and steal: NO. At the end of the day when I look at myself in the mirror I have no shame or disgust at seeing my reflection.
So who am I?
A devout Witch of 15 years.
I am a painter.
I am a bad housekeeper, and am terrible with money.
I am a good friend to have.
I compete badly with others in general and women in particular.
I am straight, and faithful when others are faithful to me.
I am happiest when near the sea.

This is who I am, take it or leave it.