I need therapy..

I think since the attack, I have never been offered so much sex. And I'm creeping myself out about what I should do. I have no urge to let anyone into my apartment unless they are the most trusted. The problem was that I was attacked by a trusted (I thought) person. However I still have the same urges, and I cant afford the batteries I'm going though with my rabbit. Will it take one huge leap to get me back into the saddle? Do I want to? Will I freak when the time comes? Hell, will I turn into a bigger nypho (sans anal) than I am? All I know is that I feel ugly, when logically I know I'm not. That might be my period talking more than psyche. I haven't found the cure for the bloodless feeling yet, hopefully that will be next. Tomorrow is Imbolc, so maybe the Goddess will have some answers, or at least hints.