Thursday, July 28, 2005


Ok my life is now been broken down into a series of "what do to now" lists. Here is the breakdown:
* Attempt to make a living at a 8-4:30 job at a university, failing miserably at it.
*Atempt to augment living with being an escort, but it is a slow spell.
* Attempt to augment living working for Mr B, but its sporadic.

* Attempt to run a swing club with limited resources (see above) while owner VERY SLOWLY recuperates from illness.
* Attempt to paint every blue moon.
* Attempt to keep a incredibly fulfilling relationship going despite distance and time constraints (luckily this one is working better than the rest).


*Attempt to avoid nervous breakdown....
*Attempt to avoid nervous breakdown....
*Oh did I mention I'm trying not to lose it?

It explains the existential funk I'm trying to stave off right now, just the hint of depression in the air. I had an interview with another department today and it went well, but wont be much more money. I wont be attending SCAD, and have no prospects in the future of doing so, unless I learn the ancient art of shitting 100$ bills. I have another business opportunity I'm checking into, but its vague as of right now. Do I have any creative outlets going right now? Besides my clandestine affair with a 16 year old (Harry Potter) and this blog, I have nil. I cant paint, it just makes me cry. my sewing has hit nothing. I'm just got my feet stuck in the knee deep mud you call life and I cant pull myself out, and the one person who could help me yank myself out is too far away to reach, with no fault of his own. Sigh...


Anonymous said...

read your blog, think you'd be really interested in this website