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Thursday, July 28, 2005

WTF

Ok my life is now been broken down into a series of "what do to now" lists. Here is the breakdown:
Financial;
* Attempt to make a living at a 8-4:30 job at a university, failing miserably at it.
*Atempt to augment living with being an escort, but it is a slow spell.
* Attempt to augment living working for Mr B, but its sporadic.

Social;
* Attempt to run a swing club with limited resources (see above) while owner VERY SLOWLY recuperates from illness.
* Attempt to paint every blue moon.
* Attempt to keep a incredibly fulfilling relationship going despite distance and time constraints (luckily this one is working better than the rest).

Emotional;

*Attempt to avoid nervous breakdown....
*Attempt to avoid nervous breakdown....
*Oh did I mention I'm trying not to lose it?


It explains the existential funk I'm trying to stave off right now, just the hint of depression in the air. I had an interview with another department today and it went well, but wont be much more money. I wont be attending SCAD, and have no prospects in the future of doing so, unless I learn the ancient art of shitting 100$ bills. I have another business opportunity I'm checking into, but its vague as of right now. Do I have any creative outlets going right now? Besides my clandestine affair with a 16 year old (Harry Potter) and this blog, I have nil. I cant paint, it just makes me cry. my sewing has hit nothing. I'm just got my feet stuck in the knee deep mud you call life and I cant pull myself out, and the one person who could help me yank myself out is too far away to reach, with no fault of his own. Sigh...

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