I'm 34 today....big fucking deal...

Today I am 34 years old, or I will be at 5:30pm today. I am depressed, as usual on my birthday. I have lived this long and have accomplished nothing. I can't go to school. Daniel is 3 hrs away and wont be here today to be with me, from no fault of his own. I'll be running my own goddamn birthday party. I probably will get laid, so it won't be a total loss.
I just wish I could shed the skin of this life, grab Daniel and run away to live our own life together. I could bartend in a tiki bar somewhere. Daniel could run the business. I could paint in the evenings, and we could start having babies......sigh.
No I guess I will remain here and be a whore and be separate from him, for a while longer.