AAAARRGGHH

My skin is crawling, hands shaking. I feel like I want to run, but don't know where to. Alas I am in the beginning stages of an anxiety attack. The magic I did last night feels like it went loopy, like I didn't ground right. Dan and I are probably separating. It is a good thing too, we may be good friends but he cannot offer me the future I need. I've been doing sex magic to try to stem the loneliness, but can't seem to shake the blues. Today is Midsummer, a high holiday, so doing magic tonight will be powerful. Maybe tonight I can shake some of this unease. Dreamed of Jack again last night, for whatever reason. I need to feel close to someone, so my astral buddy will have to do for now.