Friday, January 07, 2005

Time Game

My friend Clint just had a nifty thing on his blog. Start at 25 years ago and go by five on where you were when...
25 Years Ago:
I believe I was in Centralia IL. We lived on a farm, and my dad I think was working in the coal mines there.I was in second grade. I remember the landscape the best, very flat, very cold.

20 years ago:
I was in Inez KY. My parents had been divorced for years. We lived with my grandparents and extended family who ignored the fact I was depressed, and just heaped emotional abuse on me my sister did not get. That was the year I tried to commit suicide 3 times. Eventually I just isolated myself from all people and stayed save in my little cancer shell. Most memories were surrounded by crushes, and a very bleak grey landscape, with mountains. The saving grace was Frank Baldridge, the academic team coach that saw more than what everyone else saw and expected more. Feeling a bit of worth saved me.

15 Years ago:
I was at Marshall University, Huntington WV. I was in the midst of my first real love, Shawn Gainer. Tall and skinny ( my first run in with skinny white boy syndrome) he was the tortured artist type who smoked and drank too much. He was also a year younger. I was once again depressed, but trying to fight it. I couldn't concentrate on classes to all my focus was on him. It was also the first time I encountered witchcraft. Later that year, I would go through my first spectacular breakup, hospitalizing and last suicide attempt. And the only thing that saved me was Drawing Down the Moon by Margot Adler. It was the first time in my life I felt I wasn't all alone.

10 years ago:
I was an undergrad at University of Kentucky. I was doing Society for Creative Anachronisms almost all my spare time. The depression was there but I was in the midst of trying all the drugs I could to control it. That Feburary at a SCA event in Cincinnati, OH I met my friend's dad John. He was really nice and helped me climb stairs in the big dress I was wearing. That May John would move to Lexington to stay with his son for only two weeks, he said. That September we were married.

5 Years Ago:
We were living in Portland, OR. John was working at Shriners Hospital and I was at the Oregon Zoo. We were both getting a case of wanderlust again so we applied to work at Grand Teton National park and were hired. We moved that May. John was weak that whole summer and had a lot of accidents because he was tired and dizzy. We moved again at the end of the season to Key West FL. We had 2 normal weeks, then John started getting weaker. He was diagnosed as having Leukemia after waking up with blue legs, then finding his body wasn't making blood. I descended into a hell of cargiving and stress and worry, and ballooned to 300lbs.

1 Year ago:
I was working at UK telephone operations. I was bored and trying to get another job, and did at the grad school. I was finishing up a very educational relationship with a dom. I was also empowered by that relationship to start to exercise, and began to run. Dan also started calling again, then wanting to get romantic but not date.LOL

I'm still living in Lexington. Still at the grad school. I've met someone but of course its complicated. I'm running and weight training, but have the flu. I cant afford to take classes or much of anything. I'm hoping the new friend might have ideas to change that.