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Friday, April 20, 2007

Offensive Friday...an ongoing series..Unicorns and Swinging

In the swinging lifestyle lexicon, a unicorn is a single bi-sexual female who only plays with couples for threesomes. SBF are called unicorns because they are just as common. On swinglifestyle.com, you will see a crapload of couples looking for SBF only, and precious few single bi females. These couples are not swingers, and should not be posting on swinger websites.

For one, swinging is about couples playing with couples. Yes, occasionally, couples will want to play with a single, male or female. But, if thats ALL they want to play with, they aren't swingers. I can't count the number of couples we have gotten in touch with that had no mention of looking for unicorns on their profile, saying "Sorry, we only want to play with the female ( or male) and leave the other partner to watch" That's deceitful and dishonest, and luckily, those couples are getting a clue about putting this info out before a misunderstanding occurs. I can't count the couples who have gotten in touch with us only wanting me, and not Daniel. I'm not bi, so its not happening, sorry ladies.

Secondly, from my experience, couples only looking for unicorns have male jealousy issues not compatible with swinging. These guys love seeing their wives with other women, but having a man in the mix is threatening. These couples come to swing parties, and the men get pissed off when their women are flirted with by other men. This just happened at our last party, in fact. Um , hello, that's EXPECTED at a swing party, because its assumed that at a swing party EVERYONE gets to play. If you have two couples where both women are bi and want to play together before everyone gets in, fine. If you are a guy who has his manhood threatened by another guy, even if that same guys wife is with him, then you need to rethink swinging.

For example, Daniel played with the female of a couple about a year ago (names shall be hidden to protect the innocent and guilty) who assured him her husband would be fine with it. She forgot to mention that her and her husband had played EXCLUSIVELY with women up to that point, but never a man. Her husband didn't seem remotely interested in me, and had been drinking heavily, so I went room hopping after the party to visit friends who were having after parties, and left Daniel and her alone. About half way through their play session, the husband shows up very drunk, after playing with a chick in the women's bathroom at the hotel (we found out later), and proceeded to get in Daniel's face, asking "How did he (Daniel) like having his dick inside his wife!" I give my husband credit, he kept calm, told the guy he was lucky to have such a beautiful wife, and showed them to the door. The guy did apologise the next week, claiming drunkenness, but if everyone would have been honest at the beginning, all would have turned out better.

I'm just saying, people looking for a three-way with a unicorn need to have their own parties and websites so that their isn't any miscommunication with the true swingers. They might get 3 people to show up.

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